Let’s start with understanding what “normal” actually means. Normal is about conforming—following typical or expected behaviors so we can connect with others. This need to fit in is deeply ingrained in us, as humans have relied on groups and tribes for survival throughout history. Conformity helped ensure we weren’t rejected and left to fend for ourselves.
But today, survival doesn’t depend on conformity in the same way. While social connections are still important for a fulfilling life, the pressure to conform is no longer about life or death.
Often, we accept things as "normal" without ever questioning why. Just think about past behaviors that were once considered normal but now seem absurd. For example, smoking was once common in workplaces, restaurants, and even hospitals. It was normal back then, but not anymore. So, what are we doing today that we’ll consider crazy in the future?
Take overeating and poor dietary habits, for example. Today, it's normal to overeat during meals, snack several times a day, and rely on processed, sugar-laden foods. We celebrate with food, give it as gifts, and often feel pressured to indulge. If you skip dessert at a restaurant or avoid extra sides, someone might ask, "Aren't you having any?" But imagine if you flipped the question and asked why they were having it. That would be seen as rude.
The concept of normal even varies between households. For some, it’s normal to have a dessert after every meal or drink sugary soda regularly. Others may snack constantly throughout the day. But how often do we stop and question these behaviors?
I often talk about fasting, and while some people are intrigued, others think I’m crazy. What’s interesting is that many of them haven’t researched fasting or know even a fraction of the information I do, yet they still view it as abnormal simply because it challenges the status quo.
But eating several times a day, with snacks between meals, hasn’t always been normal. Back in the 1950s and 60s, snacking was rare. People had three meals a day, and that was it.
Most people never question why we eat three meals a day—breakfast, lunch, and dinner. When asked, they might say it’s biological, that they feel hungry at those times. But what they don’t realize is that we’ve programmed our bodies, specifically our hunger hormone ghrelin, to expect food at certain times.
For example, I used to wake up starving and would have a high-carb breakfast. But after I started intermittent fasting—waiting until noon to eat—my body adjusted. At first, I was hungry in the mornings, but now I never am. In fact, I would have to force myself to eat breakfast if I wanted to. Our bodies are programmed by our habits.
It’s important to question why certain behaviors are considered normal and decide for yourself what "normal" should be for you. Today, we have the privilege of living in a time where we can design our own lives. We aren’t at risk of death if we don’t conform, so why not evaluate our habits and make intentional changes?
Ask yourself: Why is it considered normal to eat the way we do? Is it really in our best interest? Or is it driven by food companies looking to maximize profits?
Desire is what drives all our behavior. We seek out activities that trigger dopamine, the chemical that makes us feel good. In the past, this drive helped us survive by motivating us to find food. But in today’s world, food is abundant and easily accessible. Despite that, our cravings remain just as intense because food companies have perfected combinations of sugar, fat, and salt to trigger our brain’s reward system.
The problem is, the more we indulge, the more we want. Food companies have capitalized on this, making billions by exploiting our natural tendencies. But we need to recognize this and ask ourselves: Is what we consider "normal" actually good for us?
Think about weight loss advice: Eat less, exercise more. Or follow a low-fat diet. Yet despite this advice, obesity rates have skyrocketed. Why? Because we’re not addressing the real issue. We’ve been socialized to believe that it’s normal to eat frequently and snack throughout the day. Many people even think that if they don’t eat regularly, they’ll overeat later.
Instead of accepting this, shouldn’t we be asking why? Why does skipping a snack make people anxious or uncomfortable? The truth is, many of us use food to manage our emotions. Yet, diet coaches and personal trainers often encourage eating several times a day without exploring the underlying emotional issues.
Imagine if we applied this thinking to heroin: "If you abstain from heroin, you'll just crave it more, so you should use it regularly throughout the day." It sounds absurd, yet that's exactly the logic we apply to food. The more sugar we consume, the more we want—and the more our bodies build tolerance, just like with drugs.
Obesity has become an epidemic, and the advice we’ve been given isn’t working. We need a fresh, multifaceted approach to weight loss—one that looks beyond just telling people to "eat less" and "exercise more." We need to understand our primal urges, how our bodies work, and how to replace food as a source of pleasure with healthier alternatives.
When I stopped following the crowd and embraced fasting while managing my mindset, I realized I had far more control than I ever thought possible. I stopped being a slave to food. I no longer worried about when my next meal was coming. It was liberating, and that’s when my life truly changed.